BRIGHTYABAYOR'S BLOG

Many of us today lack very many lovely things we want and desire in this life because we sincerely don’t know how to access, apprehend, obtain and retain these things. We are mostly enticed and carried away by the thrill, excitement and fun of possessing these things, we really don’t pay attention to what we really need to do to effectively acquire and manage successfully. Many of us want good jobs, but we don’t really know how to get good jobs. Many want rapid promotion at work but don’t know how to really achieve it. Many want to succeed and grow well in business but don’t really know how to make it happen. Many also want to succeed in relationships, in marriages but don’t know how to go about these successes. Many of us want to become rich legitimately but we really don’t know how to do it, we don’t know how to become honestly rich. When we want all these but can’t come achieve them easily we become discouraged, disgruntled and unhappy. Sometimes we become upset a...

A wish is simply to have a desire for something. It is a state of mind where one is emotionally expectant of a situation, a development, a possession or an experience. There is nothing wrong with having a wish, however, the realities of life makes wishes powerless and inconsequential if not vigorously pursued. A downside to the wish factors in our lives is having a strong desire for something that could actually be unattainable or even impossible. Many of us based on wishes and the strong emotions attached tend to behave and react in life based on wishes and not obvious realities. This emotional mind state consequently leads to a lot of pain, pressure and regret. Also the natural inclination of mankind to get so much for little or nothing is the empowerment of wishes. We just want things to happen with little or no effort on our part. We want to pass tough exams without reading hard, we want a fantastic spouse without being one ourselves, we want great relation...

As mankind our emotions are very powerful. Our emotions basically are expressed through the way we feel towards different things and situations. We are sometimes happy, sometimes glad, sometimes sad; sometimes miserable, we get angry sometimes and some other times indifferent. At every point in time in our life, we are exhibiting one or more of the many emotions we’re capable of expressing as human beings. Our emotions, most times determine our actions. Many of us act most of the time based on what we feel. Our good deed or bad deeds are all informed and influenced by how we feel at that point in time. This implies our emotions play a critical role in the unfolding of our lives every day. As people, we’ve lost great friends, great relationships, great opportunities and advantages based on our emotions, actions and reactions. And we’ve gained great people, privileges and advantages based on how we expressed our emotions to certain people and in certain circumstances....

Our limitations in the ability to control things is the source of our fears. We all have desires and expectations in life, there are ways we want things to occur, happen and turn out eventually, we do all we can to see to it that our expectations are met, but too many variables and forces have the power to alter, derail, mitigate or totally truncate our expectations. The consequence of not getting what we want or need can be very painful sometimes. The consequence can be depleting, demoting or even life threatening. The negative repercussion of things not happening or turning out as we please is the source of our fears. As humans we have fear for many things, including things that naturally shouldn’t be scary. We have fear for losses, fear of isolation, fear of rejection, fear of lack, poverty, sickness, attacks, accidents and even death. We are afraid of things that can hurt us physically, emotionally or psychologically. We are afraid of every form of pain so to a...

One of the most overwhelming questions on the mind of a lot of people is the question of Purpose? Why am I here? Why do I exist? Why am I in this world? What am I supposed to do? What is the reason for my being alive? And on and on goes the questions in the minds of a lot of people.  And when they’re not sure of the answer, they become exasperated and push the matter aside somewhere in their mind. Many people are afraid especially when they begin to advance in age, about not living in, or fulfilling their purpose. They are afraid of missing it in life, they want to be sure they don’t turn out to be successful failures in life – pursuing aggressively and achieving that which was not meant for them to accomplish. Many people have been taught and have reasons to believe purpose is what an individual is passionate about in life. To discover your purpose, locate your passion and that is it. But there is a fallacy with this answer in that it is very possible to be p...

There are two kinds of pains in this life, there’s the pain of sacrifice and the pain of regret. The pain of sacrifice has to do with the things you want to do, the things you enjoy doing, the things you crave for, the fun, rest and enjoyment you really, really want but have to give up in order to create for yourself a more beautiful, comfortable, peaceful and rewarding future. The pain of regret is your lack of will to give up the pleasure, fun, rest, enjoyment and indulgence of today and you later pay dearly for it when you’re too old, weak and late to fix anything or make your life great. There are no middle grounds regarding these options, you either suffer the pain today to enjoy later, or you enjoy today and suffer the pain of regret later. The principal factor that discourages us from doing the necessary today whilst still young and able is the fear of pain. The fear of different kinds of pains, these pains could include physical, emotional or psychological pai...

Many years ago you perhaps had a different life plan from what you’re currently living in. Many of us today are living lives different from what we wished for, longed for or dreamt of. Many of us today have lost our power, control and dominion in life to that desperate need for money and the need to make ends meet. In a bid to make a living, we sacrificed our true lives, in a desperate move to pay bills we mortgaged our real destinies. Many people today are in the work fields of the world’s system. They are in the service of an ordered pattern of life giving their time, talent, energy and abilities to build and maintain world structures and frameworks based on current socioeconomic dictates and demands. Many of us know if we have the power, the means and the choice, we wouldn’t be working where we are working, doing what we are doing or living the life we are living. We have accepted and yielded to what life handed us, not what we sincerely want in this life. We’...

The young lady was very beautiful, charming respectful and collected. She was an employee at one of the richest and most successful IT firms in  Nigeria. She knelt again to say goodbye to her aunt as she hurriedly walked towards her parked brand new official car. She looked so happy, successful and progressive in life. She actually came to drop off her eight months old baby and her nanny at her aunt’s place before heading off to the office. I saw admiration in the eyes of her aunt as she gazed at her 29 year old niece as she entered the back seat of her official car to be driven to work by her official driver. He own mother had relocated to the UK 2 years earlier for medical attention and to spend some time with another one of her children. Hence the reason for bringing her baby to her aunt’s place. As she drove off, the aunt realized I was looking at her and suddenly smiled, she shrugged and then sighed. “Opportunity is important in life”, she professed t...